That diminutive genius of Riverdale, Dilton, is a hit with everybody - except girls. I dunno, maybe it's the Little Lord Fauntelroy outfit.


Who will "help"? Big Moose.


Dilton doesn't want his romantic night out to conclude with an arrest for contributing to the delinquincy of a minor? So picky. Try again Moose!


No, Moose, Dilton doesn't want to date old ladies, or his mom. You know who I really feel sorry for at this point? Midge.


Dilton's other friends take a completely different approach and simply pony up the cash to hire an "escort". If you want the job done right, get a professional!


Frustrated and humiliated by the constant pressure from friends and family, Dilton's repressed urges finally warp his brain beyond every rule of God or man. What's going on here, Dilton? Dilton? No. No, Dilton.


Oh yeah, you'll need the clothes. For a little while, anyway.


Miss Grundy is helping Dilton build his love-robot. I repeat, Miss Grundy is HELPING Dilton build his love-robot. Somebody call the PTA.


Um, Miss Grundy? A little too excited by all this, aren't we? Hello?


Ohh, the SCIENCE FAIR. Yeah, that's right, the science fair. Sure. I bet.


So, LAUGH COMICS number 218, May 1969 - Dilton Builds Sex Robot, Nobody Cares.


Except those boring straight people, who are still having old-fashioned human sex. Get with the 20th century, losers!
Chastened by his experience (maybe the TREAT DILTON COLDLY button got jammed), Dilton later appears with a hideous perm.


Remember kids - DON'T DATE ROBOTS! It leads to perms.

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