Spring is just around the corner, and that means everywhere young people are coming out of hibernation and feeling their fancies turning to love. But how can romance take root when the object of your affection keeps hitting the road? Well, let's find out.


How long can a girl go on pleading with a boy before she starts wondering if it's her? And how damaged can a comic book get before responsible retailers will withdraw it from sale? Apparently this damaged. Sorry about the hole.


"At the age of 9 my love for Daniel was like the light of a firefly, helping me to escape the terrifying square of nothingness that threatened the existence of reality itself."


"We knew what love was, because our playground was right next to Makeout Point and Second Base Creek."


Someday Binnie and Daniel would be married. And judging by that illustration and depending on what state they lived in, that someday might be sooner than they think!


One innocent kiss during a game of "post office" at a children's party and Mom is all "gotta get my little darling away from that wild boy before they get in trouble, better go somewhere for a month!"

By the way, I would not know what "post office" was if not for mid-century American comics. MY generation didn't need to make up silly games, we just went straight to the teen pregnancy.


Well, Binnie, you're nine, you have lots of time to find yourself another boyfriend. And maybe also come up with a new name, while you're at it. I mean, "Binnie"? What's that short for, Bennifred? Bwendolyn? Bennifer?


That evening was the first of so many evenings to follow, as heartbreak and an untreated eating disorder took root in Binnie's psyche.


From the west to the east, all across the nation, Binnie was shipping them off to the Friend Zone left and right! Don't worry fellas, that zone ain't even half full yet.


I can still remember the thought that flitted through my head as I read this story, that even when the inker is doing him no favors, Gene Colan was a hell of a comic book artist!


But what's this? It's... it's Daniel, all teenaged up!


Is this where the story takes a sharp left turn into becoming a public service message about the challenges of dyslexia?


Wow, all this trouble and heartbreak because nobody felt like gambling a two-cent postage stamp or making a long distance phone call. It's cheaper than you think, 1960s!


And so Daniel and Binnie were together and they lived happily ever after. The end. Thanks for coming, everybody.


Nope, here it comes, you know when somebody starts referencing Bernie Krigstein's "Master Race" that bad things are going down!


For a second time love is ripped from Binnie's grasp, not by the good people at Allied Van Lines, but by some Swiss prep school that probably turns out finance bros and Bond villains.


That's it Binnie, cry yourself to sleep, let it all out, you'll feel better in a little while, I'm sure you'll move past this and get on with your life eventually.


SIX YEARS LATER she's wandering the streets, every minute filled with an internal monologue all about what DANIEL is probably up to this very minute, he'll probably just walk right up to her any minute now, that would be just like him, wouldn't it? Isn't that right, DANIEL?? (she whirls around, points at nothing)


Can Binnie love anything as much as she loved Daniel? Like, for instance, her beloved big city sidewalks, that are now about to mercilessly betray her?


Fashionable footwear strikes again. Don't worry Binnie, you're surrounded by helpful downtown characters. A friendly local pickpocket is sure to help you back to your feet!


And then from out of nowhere, driven by the almost unstoppable cosmic need to wrap this story up quickly, it's what appears to be Daniel!


Binnie can't go on without first checking to see if Daniel's life choices are no longer being defined by "where his parents move" and "where they're sending him to school." If Daniel ditches her again, it's got to be all Daniel.


(sound of needle scratching record) This isn't Daniel? Then.. then... then this story was maybe about Binnie's face blindness all along? How many "Daniels" has she gone through?


Now this - where some total stranger stalks her, waiting for his chance to swoop in to the rescue, not creepy at all - a total stranger that she thinks is somebody completely different for a disturbingly long time - THIS is REALLY love? It's really something, that's for sure.

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